Agreements

Intrigue… drama…suspense…and, no, I’m not talking about my love life, which would fall more comfortably into the Ambien substitute category. Work provides enough drama to fully satisfy just about anyone’s need. I had a situation this week where I was forced to contemplate that someone was operating with less than 100% transparency. It kind of made me ill to think about it. Then it made me mad. My name is splashed across approvals for a lot of financial documents (as well as that of my boss) so I'm kind of sensitive about such things. That’s one thing I dig about my boss, he loves to make money, but he’s honest to a fault and demands everyone else he works with is as well.

Makes me wish everyone operated within the parameters of this pretty simple concept: The Four Agreements, a philosophy based on ancient Toltec teachings. Don Miguel Ruiz wrote a book in 1997 with the same name. It goes a little somethin’ like this (I like to say these with a sassy urban hip hop kind of cadence—cause I’m one hep cat):

agreement 1Be impeccable with your word - Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.

agreement 2Don’t take anything personally - Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.

agreement 3Don’t make assumptions - Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

agreement 4Always do your best - Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.

It’s simple to say, "Yeah, I can be honest, I can keep my word, I can do this stuff, no problem." Applying it and integrating it into one’s overall personal operating instructions is much, much harder. But, it would be a good place, I think, for some of us to start.

Today, I was standing out on the street in front of the building, apparently totally zoned out. A co-worker walked by and said, surprisingly, "You looked totally zoned out." Well, I was. I was listening to the music in my head and was a little scared about what was playing on today’s playlist. It’s country—bleck —an old Ronny Milsap song, "Daydreams About Night Things…" Please make it stop by delivering the architect’s new intern to me, whom I' m sure could help me rid myself of this terrible affliction.

 

Thoughts have no sex.
~Clare Boothe Luce (oh yeah, wanna bet?)

Published on: Jun 10, 2006